So now that the dust has settled and the Sports Information Network is proven to win continuously for a second straight year, we’re going to go ahead and offer not one, but two playoff picks packages for the 2018 playoffs. To be clear, they are two totally separate systems managed by two totally separate people, and if you’re one of our members you’ll already know who’s stepping up to the plate.
The first package is the patented workhorse of a prediction sheet you all know and love: The Jacques Tannenbaum NFL Tout. This is based on his patented algorithms for predicting NFL player performance that he then uses to smash every bookie from here to Mumbai. This is the model that has made SIN famous and has caused such a ruckus in the mainstream sports betting media – just kidding: still no interview requests yet. However, it did get all of our members paid last year and that’s enough to make us happy (for now).
You probably have some questions – here’s what I think they are.
What in the EFF is going on here? Two touts? Do you guys think that you’re the Adam Duritz of online gambling and can date both Jennifer Aniston and Courtney Cox?
Well first of all that’s quite a strange and obscure reference to be making on a website selling betting picks and you probably just lost the under 30 crowd, but yes, we believe that we can offer two successful touts. Many websites out there have multiple experts handicapping the same sport and sell individual packages. (They just don’t publish their records when they lose.)
Ok, I’ll listen. What’s the difference between the two touts?
The Tannebaum Tout relies on a patented algorithm and “science” to create an Excel worksheet that displays what the “true” numbers should be for the star players on an NFL team. He may or may not use 7 herbs and spices before he serves it.
Liam Mahoney has zero algorithms, sheets, or prediction models. He’s simply looking for market inefficiencies, over-adjustments, and soft lines in a variety of different markets in real time, and then sends out book-specific plays whenever possible.
How will I receive the picks for the Tannebaum Tout?
The same way we’ve always sent them: an email at the start of the day, and if necessary a follow-up email a little later with more numbers if we were waiting to find out who’s starting. It’s regular and it will always arrive in time for you to look at the numbers and then go find weak lines always found at online sportsbooks. We tell you what the true numbers should be and then you go find which bookies have made mistakes with their numbers – it’s a tale as old as time itself.
How will I receive the plays for the Liam Mahoney “Pocket Picks” Tout?
They will be sent out in the same fashion as the NCAAF Bowl tout, which is currently winning at a rate of 58%, making a $100 bettor up $2,600 on his plays. These are emailed directly in real time as Liam finds them. He identifies a line he’s getting down on himself, he stakes it, then he sends the pick out. You’ll have to be committed in order for this tout to work for you – he will of course try to send out plays as early as possible but sometimes the best edges are found right before kick off. For this reason, ONLY PURCHASE THIS PACKAGE IF YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO QUICKLY GET DOWN ONCE RECEIVING THEM.
You literally might only have a few minutes to get your action in, but we obviously will send them out as soon as we find them. Fortunately it’s 2018 and everyone has a cell phone and a mobile-friendly sportsbook…right?
What types of wagers is Liam going to be sending out?
Anything and everything. Game line plays, half time, quarters, player props, in game wagers…anything he sees that he likes and is backing himself will be sent out.
Why are you guys being so transparent with what you’re selling?
Because we are the greatest and most honest touts in the history of touting. Not only has every single one of our touts been amazing, (except for one), we also publish all of our plays afterwards so our members know we’re 100% transparent. It’s just how we roll.
To be honest, initially we were a bit hesitant about doing two unique NFL touts because technically we could be sending out conflicting advice. However, since both systems are based on advantage wagers that should yield a profit over time, both are valuable in their own way. Our bar is set at a 55% win percentage for both but we’ll happily take any extra gravy flowing onto our plates.
Not to mention, this site could conceivably grow to have numerous touts selling picks on it for the same sports – all they’d have to do is commit to offering a profitable system and publishing every single play. No problem, right?
Golly! You make a very good case but I’m still not convinced – this website seems a little weird. What’s up with your lobster fetish?
Well that’s a very personal question but I will answer it. We promote The Lobster Life – a life of luxury you will achieve when you either A) become a professional who wins or B) buy picks from professionals who win.
Also, we don’t take life too seriously – when you always have extra cash laying around from beating the bookies you just feel happier throughout the day. Actually, I guess that’s what we’re technically selling: happiness. Ain’t life grand?
Ok – you’ve heard enough. If you don’t buy from us, good luck with whomever you go with. You’ll need it.